Today.2.

Today has to be to have been one of the worst days of my life.

Today I found out that I’ve lost my words…imagine the amount of PAIN i am in, l0”0k at that, I didn’t even CAPTIALIZE I…I’m already going thru so much shit in my life right now…Still waiting on my Military Benefits, still looking for others who are waiting on benefits…To lose my WORDS on top of

                                                                 THAT

My words were all that I had left…My book, my lives’ story, my hopes, my dreams…All of those things were tied to those words..Fuck!!! < That is what I have to cap of my week…with all that I’ve found out. Like how I manage to do just about any/everything wrong(and I do that quite well I might I add), I make horrible decisions and I am financially irresponsible. That’s just the shit that I already knew & someone still felt they needed to tell me(no I will not let it go). I found out this week that outside of my children, my life is full of unsuccessful careers, failed relationships and shattered dreams. I found out that my inbox is filled with too many offers for me to buy anything, apparently they don’t do their research properly or they’d realize that if I don’t pay my bill collectors, why would I take them up on

THIER OFFER for a “One Time Payment”…?

Add to that the $500 dollars that I had to pay to get my car towed home today, after having my clutch go out in the middle of nowhere and calling a tow truck guy who was on the roof of his house cleaning out his gutters at the time. A 60-Year Old guy up on his roof, working on his “Honey-Do” List…Riding all the way back home in the cab of a tow truck, telling stories and hearing “hometown” stories with a man from New Orleans…a white guy with a wife who is a Special Ed teacher and his 13 y/o niece who just moved in with them from Indiana. We shared stories about getting “good ass-whippin’s” when you got in trouble growing up and how things have changed today, he told me about New Orleans pre and post Katrina, he told me about how the Toll Booths on the bridges got shut down because the people inside kept getting shot at. We confirmed the fact that anyone who has ever been in the military has a story about a crazy cat they knew from Kentucky. He told me about his life, he told me stories about “jobs” and about “wrecks”. He gave me an inside look at what life is like as a “Wrecker” and he did it in such a descriptive manner. As bad as my week and my day were going, I needed that guy, he added to my growing list of people with stories.Showed me that it still may be possible for people to “connect”.  He and I shared Army stories..He was in the Army Reserves back in the 70’s, served 8 years I think he said…graduated high school in 1968 and got his “letter” 2 years later. He gave a “wave” and a “head nod” to every Sheriff and Highway Patrol car that we passed, almost like if you asked, he could tell you their first names. 

He told me a story about this girl who 4 months back went to visit her boyfriend who was out fishing on a lake. He had his boat out in the middle of the water and was guiding her to where he was on his cell phone. The chick gets there and pulls up to the bank of the river. She gets out of the car and starts heading over to where her boyfriend was. As she’s doing that her car is rolling into the river because she had left it in neutral, an ‘06 BMW…Took 4 1/2 hours for them to fish it out of the lake.  When we finally reached my house and got my car down, he showed me his I.D card from way back then. That thing was old, so old that it had the picture laminated onto it.

Today, I paid $500 dollars to ride with a complete stranger and new friend for 2 hours..All on a day when 24 only went for 14, but the Lakers still managed to put the Rockets launch on DELAY..damn and I just remembered that I ran out of words to say…